Details

The bane of my existence.
I'm really good at coming up with a story, and really good at writing it. But then I re-read it and realize that it could be so much better if I just knew how to add detail. And it's not even the big things. It's the little things that I read in other people's books and love, but can't figure out how to utilize in mine.
Take the first few pages of Poison Study. She describes where the main character is and what she's going through so well that you feel like you're there, you feel like you, yourself, are being led to the gallows to die. It's amazing.
I've come to figure out that I'm really bad at "showing" and not "telling". And I know that it's something that comes with practice. Sometimes I feel like I do a really good job, and then I read over it and think "that's not nearly as good as I thought it was".
Does anyone else have this problem?
Does anyone have suggestions on how to fix it?

More Dialogue exercises

            “Move over an inch.”

            “I can’t. There’s a wall there.”

            “Well, I can’t see.”

            “Be glad. Also, keep your voice down. They’ll hear you.”

            “What are they doing?”

            “The black guy is sitting down. The guys in suits are standing around him. I think they’re trying to convince him to do something.”

            “And I think we should get out of here. What if they see us?”

            “They’re not going to see us.”

            “If you can see them, they can see you.”

            “Well, they’re going to see us if you keep babbling. Shut up.”

            “What are they doing now?”

            “The boss guy just slapped the black guy.”

            “Maybe we should call the police.”

            “What would we say? Hey these guys are here and one of them just got slapped?”

            “Well I’m leaving. Stay if you want. But the guys are waiting, and I want pizza.”

            “Yeah, yeah. I’ll be there in a bit, ya chicken.”

            “I’m not a chicken!”

            “Of course you’re not.”

            “I’m just hungry. And what’s going on down there isn’t any of our business.”

            “Oh crap!”

            “What?”

            “I think they just saw me.”

            “Run?”

            “Run!”

We did dialogue exercises in my writing group last night. This definitely isn't my best work, but I'm using it as encouragement for other to do the same. It's good practice, especially if you're bad at dialogue, like I am. I am getting better. The trick is to try to make the two different voices so different enough that you can tell who is talking and see the story in your head without outside description. For a better example, visit Brandon Sanderson's blog. He has good examples of everything. :D

Bipolar and Writing

Last October, I was diagnosed with Bipolar II disorder. I actually diagnosed myself, went to my doctor, and told him what I thought. He agreed and put me on medication.

It's helping A LOT! It's actually amazing how well it's helping. It's not, however, doing everything. What do I do to supplement my medication?

I write.

I actually talked to another author about this who is also bipolar. She says that writing helps because you have to use both sides of your brain to do it. The creative side to come up with the story, and the logical side to organize it.

My life suddenly made sense.

All my life, I couldn't tell if I was "right brained" or "left brained". I figured I was left brained, since I was really good at math, but couldn't draw a picture to save my life. But at the same time, I was more imaginative than almost anyone I knew, thinking of things that no one would ever think of and coming up with solutions to problems that are unlikely to occur.

I'm bipolar. And it all makes sense.

It's interesting how one revelation can change your life. I'm not going to put this author's name up, as I don't know that she'd want me to, but I have a feeling that she will never know just how grateful I am that she said those things that day. She went through several years where she didn't write at all and it just about destroyed her. I'm amazed. I can't go through more than a few weeks.

I suppose you could say that we're addicted to writing.

I'm okay with that.

The Two Little Boys and the Big Bad Mess

Just a random story I wrote one night to get one of the pages for my writing group.

            Once upon a time, there were two little boys. They were brothers, and were both very silly little boys. One day, they were playing at their grandmother’s house. They had strewn Legos and books and train tracks and car tracks all over the floor of the family room. But when it was time to go home, they didn’t want to pick them up!

            “You better clean up,” their dad said, “or something weird might happen.”

            But the two little boys didn’t believe him. Which is silly, when you think about it, since their daddy had never lied to them.

            And so they decided not to clean up.

            So the next day when they came over, the mess was still there, as their grandmother had been too busy to clean it up for them.

            So they played and played and made an even bigger mess than they had before. And again, when it was time to go, they didn’t want to clean up.

            “You’d better clean up,” their dad said again, “or something weird might happen.”

            But nothing weird had happened the day before, so they didn’t think it would happen this time either. So they left without cleaning up.

            The next day, the mess was still there, because their grandma was too busy to clean it up for them. Besides, she hadn’t made the mess.

            So they played and they played and they made an even bigger mess than before. And when it was time to go, they didn’t want to clean up.

            “You’d better clean up,” their dad said, “or something weird might happen.”

            And the boys didn’t believe him. After all, nothing had happened the first day, and nothing had happened the second day. Nothing weird was going to happen.

            But then, something weird did happen. The mess came to life! A hand made out of Legos grabbed the older boy’s leg and started dragging him away from his dad. The trains all forced the younger boy away from his mom.

            “What do we do?” The boys cried.

            “Clean up.” Their dad stated. He had been in this situation before, and he had tried to warn them.

            So the boys started throwing everything into the bins that they belonged to. All of the Legos went into the Lego bucket. All of the train tracks and car tracks went into the Tupperware bin they belonged in. They could move on their own again! They quickly put the books on the bookshelf and ran out to their parents.

            “We’ll never leave things a mess again!” They resolved, clinging to their parents’ legs.

            “We’re sure you won’t.” Their mother said kindly, and then led them out to the car to head home.

Protagonists and antagonists annoyances

I hate it when my characters won't do what I want them to. I tell my protagonist to be mad enough at one of my antagonists to want to wipe them all out, and all I get is "Why?". Well, obviously, because they're evil.

My character doesn't really care about that, because she already has my other antagonist to be mad at. And she definitely has good reason to be mad at them, considering they are the reasons for her family all being dead. That's pretty harsh.

But the antagonist that I need her to also be mad at, to wipe out, hasn't ever hurt her. In fact, they are effectively wiping out the guys she already hates. So what's a writer to do?

The only thing I can really think of is to have the first bad guys (the ones she already mad at), threaten her to get rid of the other bad guys. I just don't know if that's a good enough motivation. If anyone who reads this has any suggestions (if anyone reads this at all), I'd be open to anything.